Most children grow well and become well-adjusted in the society, especially if they are nurtured by the love and care of two parents who are themselves mentally sound.
However, a few kids struggle with low self esteem, especially if they grew up in situations that made it difficult to be themselves or blossom in areas they are most gifted in.
A lot of situations can sow the seed of low self esteem in a child and over time this seed gains roots and begins to grow. Some likely causes of low self esteem in children include:
1. Having a Disapproving Authority Figure
Everyone should be corrected one they do wrong, but having the authority figure constantly harp at your wrongdoings while never pointing at your strengths can be very damaging to your psyche.
Excessive or constantly criticizing your child makes it difficult for her to believe in herself. Initially she would try so hard to meet your expectations. But overtime she loses the zeal to do so, especially if she never meets up in your eyes.
2. Being too Busy for Her
While you want the best for your kids, being too busy that you fail to give her enough attention can also have a negative impact on her.
This can make her feel she’s unimportant, especially if you are unable to make important events in her life.
3. Being too Protective
Being an overprotective guardian affects a child in that they become unsure of themselves.
Trying to do everything for your kids or protect them from every pain possible, grooms them into believing they are inadequate to handle situations on their own, and when faced with such they become unsure of their abilities, freeze up, or make mistakes.
4. Learning Difficulties
A child with learning difficulties will likely feel depressed each time he’s in a school environment. His feelings of low self esteem worsens if you as his parents dontcare about his challenges or are too busy to guide him on how to solve them.
Physical, sexual, or emotional trauma can also damage your child’s self esteem. Children who grew up under violence, watching their parents fight constantly, usually struggle with some sort of esteem or management issues. Also, children who experience some form of sexual abuse also battle with self esteem as they turn to blame themselves for the act, especially if it goes untreated.
Why You Should Help Build Your Child’s Self Esteem
Children with healthy self esteem feel good about themselves and confident of their ability to do things right. They mix easily with other kids, and approach their academics with optimism, believing they will do well. Because self esteem- healthy or otherwise- is pervasive, a healthy esteem sets them up for success in almost every area of their lives. And in cases where they make mistakes, they recover quickly recover, make the necessary adjustments and move on.
How You Can Help Your Child Build a Healthy Self Esteem
1. Get Close to Your Kid
Most children would only open up to you if they feel you accept them as they are. You might want to desist from constantly criticizing them when they make mistakes. This is not saying you shouldn’t correct them when they err, but engage in constructive criticisms, trying not to project your disappointment in them across all the time.
2. Be Actively Involved in their Lives
Your child needs to know that you care enough to take an active role in their lives. Make him understand he comes first, no matter what.
3. Offer Praises, When Necessary
Be free in praising him for good deeds when he earns it. Children love praises and this will make him feel good about himself and strive to earn more.
4. Focus on Her Strength
Identify areas she’s good at and strive to help her grow in them. Also make her know that while she should work at overcoming her weaknesses, it doesn’t make her a bad person for having them and everyone has some.
5. Teach Your Child How to Do Things
Teach her how to get things done, especially if its the first time. Do it the first time around then give room for her to do it herself with your guidance. Its okay if she makes mistakes as she’ll come to learn mistakes are a part of life.